KID – NAP Zzzzzz!!

Yesterday morning I was in a very Jolly mood. I wanted to watch “A Wednesday” (The movie of course!) from a long time and me and my friends had finally agreed on a common time to watch it.

But finding out the time for the show in Wednesday’s newspaper was the biggest blunder I could ever make.

 

Why was it a blunder, because I didn’t realize that two new movies were releasing the next day and the show timing would be changed. We reached I Max half an hour before the show start time (that’s quite an achievement, and we were considering submitting it to the Limca Book of Records) and realized that there was no show for A Wednesday at 1.40pm instead there were N number of shows for Kidnap and Drona.

 

We didn’t want another Indian Superhero Saga, so we reluctantly settled on Kidnap (Another Blunder) as we didn’t wanna go home without watching a movie on a Holiday.

 

Okay enough of my misfortunes, let’s get to the point. I personally never write or read reviews of movies for they give away Half of the story and leave the viewer with nothing to guess. But this time I made an exception to my Golden Rule to save everybody from this 3 hour torture.

 

The movie starts with a song ( I should have walked out right at that time !!) with Minisha Lamba praising herself about how cool she is which she is not at all (No offence to the guys who like her, but she cannot carry the image of a sexy rich 18 year old girl).

 

The story line goes something like this: Separated Parents, 18 year old girl living with her super rich and super arrogant Mom (Vidya Malvade), and the father (Sanjay Dutt) very ultra rich himself has not seen his daughter since she was 12. The wife absolutely detests the husband saying he is a mean and selfish guy.

 

Minissha Lamba we’ll call her Sonia(S for Sonia the first song Remember??) from now on, goes for a swim in the sea after an argument with her mom and wakes up at in the evening at a weird place with Imran Khan making tea and informing her in a very informal tone that “This is a Kidnapping” (How sweet). Now she’s a very intelligent(Pun Intended) girl so she does not believe it and thinks it’s a prank , but later realizes that she is actually Kidnapped( Wow what reflexes). 

 

What happens later is one of the worst kidnapping examples in the history of Bollywood. Kabir (Imran Khan) is a highly troubled soul because Vikrant Raina (Sanjay Dutt) had gotten him put into jail after he tried to borrow his car to save the life of one of his friends from the orphanage that he lives in, and Sonia also somehow gets into that car and they meet with an accident (Both are not more than 12 years old at that time). So Kabir wants to get back at Vikrant Raina by kidnapping his daughter. So he calls up Vikrant from a different number each time and leaves him clues to get to his daughter.

 

The clues are so simple that even a five year old kid can solve them, but they ponder over it like it’s a Science Puzzle. I will not go into more details of the so called Stunts that Sanjay Dutt performs to get to those clues (it’s not worth it).

 

Now there is one thing I seriously don’t understand is why is Kabir such a sweet and considerate Kidnapper? Sonia gets a change of cloths twice a day, and mind you they are the most skimpiest and

transparent outfits you could imagine. If I were a kidnapper I would certainly not take the pains to buy clothes for my victim( and yes how in the world would I know the sizes lolz). He also takes her to have a bath in a waterfall( Foreign Location of course) knowing very well that she could try and escape, which she thankfully does but cant succeed. She gets one more bright chance later in the movie when Kabir is unconscious due to a bullet but returns back to apparently “End it all in a Good way” ( Wow Sati Savitri suddenly).

 

The only good scene in the movie is when Sanjay Dutt is supposed to find a Rs 1000 note from his business rivals’ Tijori, (which also brags about the clarity of Nokia camera phones) but looks stolen from some Hollywood movie.

 

There is no point in going further into the story as it would only make you lose faith in Bollywood Thrillers. One last relief was that Kabir and Sonia DO NOT FALL IN LOVE in the end (Pheww, Thank Heavens!!)

 

So all in all a movie where there are unnecessary songs, characters can’t carry their images, change clothes faster than lightening, act badly and cant hold the movie together. I hope Drona is not as big a disappointment.